Help When Life's Direction is Fuzzy - Part Four

Love Extravagantly

I Cor 13:12-13 the Message
We don't yet see things clearly. We're squinting in a fog, peering through a mist. But it won't be long before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! We'll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us, knowing him directly just as he knows us! But for right now, until that completeness, we have three things to do to lead us toward that consummation: Trust steadily in God [Faith], hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And best of the three is love.

When life's direction looks fuzzy, it is a time to remember four things.

God has acted in the past.
God has promised to act in the future.
God is moving in the present.
Life is lived in the tension between.

God says Love extravagantly. It calls for a love that is out of this world. The kind of love that God has for you and demonstrates for us to learn from and live for.

There are two ways to Love, the way of the World and the way God does.

There were four words people used for love in the world of the New Testament.

EROS A word that was not actually used in the New Testament but was alluded to. It meant sexual passion; arousal, its gratification and fulfillment. . The Greek word is probably not used in the New Testament because the origin of the word came from the mythical god Eros, the god of love. It is inferred in many scriptures and is the only kind of love that God restricts to a one-man, one-woman relationship within the bounds of marriage (Heb. 13:4; Song 1:13; 4:5-6; 7:7-9; 8:10; 1 Cor. 7:25; Eph. 5:31).

STORGE Storge is the natural bond between mother and infant, father, children, and kin.

. William Barclay states, "We cannot help loving our kith and kin; blood is thicker than water." (N.T. Words, 1974)

PHILEO Phileo love is a love of the affections. It is delighting to be in the presence of another, a warm feeling that comes and goes with intensity. The Bible encourages it but it is never a direct command. . God never commands phileo since this type of love is based on the feelings.

. God Himself did not phileo the world but rather operated in agape love towards us. I cannot have a warm tender feeling toward an enemy but I can agape love them.

AGAPE Agape love is God's kind of love.

. It is seeking the welfare and betterment of another regardless of how we feel. Agape does not have the primary meaning of feelings or affection.

. Jesus displayed it when he went to the cross and died for you and me regardless of how He felt. In the gospels Jesus prayed, "..Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me: nevertheless, not as I will, but as thou wilt." (Mt. 26:39; Mk. 14:36; Lk. 22:41-43; Jn. 18:11) Jesus sought the betterment of you and me, regardless of His feelings. Matthew 7:12 states it this way, "So whatever you wish that men would do to you, do so to them; for this is the law and the prophets." (RSV)

. We can agape our enemies regardless of how we feel. If they are hungry, we can feed them; if they thirst we can give them a drink (Rom. 12:20-21). We can choose to seek the betterment and welfare of others regardless of how we feel.

Jesus was the greatest expression of love that ever came into the world, but it is never recorded that he ever said the words, "I love you!"

Why? because 95 percent of all love is non-verbal. Jesus did not love with just words but in deed and truth (1 Jn. 3:18).

ALL LOVE IS CREATED BY GOD. What makes the difference between a person whose spirit is controlled by the world, and a person who is controlled by God, is this;

THE DIFFERENCE IS WHICH LOVE IS IN CONTROL. Healthy love is integrated love with Agape in control, at the top. The ordering of love that is Godlike is Agape, eros, storge, and then phileo. See Chart brian insert link to overhead here.

C.Swindoll calls this "The Commandments of Masculinity"

1. He shall not cry

2. He shall not display weakness

3. He shall not need affection or gentleness or warmth

4. He comfort but not desire comforting.

5. He shall be needed but not need.

6. He shall touch but not be touched.

7. He shall be steel not flesh.

8. He shall be inviolate in his manhood

9. He shall stand alone.

Those who obey that law will never know authentic love. Mark it down. Never.

There are a lot of loveless people in the world.

Faith helps us navigate life.

Hope helps us survive life.

Love is the reason to live life.

Paul says without love - I am nothing. - The Message interprets " I am bankrupt." That is, I am Nothing. If I have all the gifts - and mountain moving faith - I am nothing without love.
The mark of a Christian is not all the gifts - but love. Love is the enigma - it is what we all seek - yet elusive.

Secularism and Materialism has no explanation for love nor can it explain our need for it. It an intangible, nonbiological phenomenon we would die for and die without.

When we Love we are like God.
1 John 4:19 We love because he first loved us.
Ephesians 5: 2ff TM Mostly what God does is love you. Keep company with him and learn a life of love. Observed how Christ loved us. His love was not cautious but extravagant. He didn't love in order to get something from us but to give everything of himself to us. Love is like that.

We are commanded to Love - Agape - not Phileo Opposite of love is not hate - apathy.

Rev 3:15 I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! 16 So, because you are lukewarm--neither hot nor cold--I am about to spit you out of my mouth. Do you have a problem with someone - ignoring them is not right. Love is a choice Love your enemies.

1 John 4:7 Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. 1 John 4:11 Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. 12 No one has beheld God at any time; if we love one another, God abides in us, and His love is perfected in us. If not a choice - if we couldn't control our love, lust and affection

Rom 13:9 The commandments, "Do not commit adultery," "Do not murder," "Do not steal," "Do not covet," and whatever other commandment there may be, are summed up in this one rule: "Love your neighbor as yourself." Another man's wife. If not a choice - a command to be obeyed why four times in NT instruct Husbands to agape their wives?

Paul says - 1 Cor 12:31 But earnestly desire the greater gifts. And I show you a still more excellent way. Why - because our temptation - to live other ways.

1 Cor 13:13 But now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

What is love? TM1 Cor. 13:1-13 [4] Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love doesn't want what it doesn't have. Love doesn't strut, Doesn't have a swelled head, [5] Doesn't force itself on others, Isn't always "me first," Doesn't fly off the handle, Doesn't keep score of the sins of others, [6] Doesn't revel when others grovel, Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth, [7] Puts up with anything, Trusts God always, Always looks for the best, Never looks back, But keeps going to the end. [8] Love never dies. Said a little slower:

LOVE IS LONG SUFFERING.

God's love has a tolerance for and endures trying situations and persons beyond an average standard. God's love is patient.

LOVE IS KIND. God's love is of a friendly nature, generous, hospitable, warm-hearted, and good. God's love is charitable and helpful, showing sympathy and understanding for others. It is considerate, forbearing, tolerant, courteous, and thoughtful, desiring only to promote anothers welfare. It is generous, liberal, and beneficial, demonstrating itself in kindly acts.

LOVE DOES NOT ENVY. God's love does not resent another's good fortune or desire to have what is his. God's love is not jealous and does not deprive another of what he has.

LOVE DOES NOT STRUT ITSELF. God's love does not boast and brag or abound with self-praise. It is not vain nor proud.

LOVE IS NOT PUFFED UP. God's love is not high-minded or puffed up with pride.

LOVE IS NOT RUDE. God's love does not act, react, function, or perform in a manner which is in bad taste, improper, or in violation of what is right.

LOVE SEEKS NOT HER OWN. God's love does not demand its own way.

LOVE IS NOT EASILY PROVOKED. God's love is not easily annoyed or incited to anger or resentment.

LOVE DOES NOT SCHEME. God's love does not reason about or reflect upon that which causes or constitutes misfortune, suffering, difficulty, or the like. God's love does not ponder upon wickedness.

LOVE DOES NOT FIND JOY IN INJUSTICE OR EVIL. God's love feels joyful when right, sincerity, integrity, honesty, and truth prevail.

LOVE STICKS IT OUT WITH PATIENCE. God's love makes it possible to withstand all stress and difficulty. Because God is love, He supports and carries on His own Person whatever is placed upon Him. God's love protects, covers, and keeps off anything which threatens the benefit and welfare of another. God's love holds back, refrains, and is tolerant and patient in all circumstances.

LOVE BELIEVES ALL THINGS. God's love puts faith in others, believing the best of everyone (without criticizing or looking for fault).

LOVE HOPES ALL THINGS. God's love persists in hoping, against all odds, in confidence and expectation of fulfillment of that which is promised.

LOVE ENDURES ALL THINGS. God's love causes one to carry on through, despite hardships.

LOVE NEVER FAILS. God's love never proves insufficient in duration or is unsuccessful in effectiveness. Love will never disappoint or prove undependable. God's love goes on forever and will never come to an end. In the long run, you never lose when you love the way God loves. Love extravagently.

C Swindoll, says "I find five statements that say it all."

I accept you as you are.

I believe you are valuable

I care when you hurt

I desire only what is best for you

I erase all offenses

When life's direction seems fuzzy, Agape - Love extravagently.

I Cor 14:1 TM Go after a life of love as if your life depended on it because it does.

Revelation 2:4 TM I see what you've done, your hard, hard work, your refusal to quit.... I know your persistence, your courage in my cause that wears you out. But you walked away from your first love -- why? .... Turn back! Recover your dear early love. No time to waste.... For right now, until that completeness, we have three things to do to lead us toward that consummation: Trust steadily in God, hope unswervingly, love extravagantly. And the best of the three is love. I Corinthians 13:13